Leg Post 72
Leg Post 72 continues not only Leg Post 71 but also after the events of Leg Post 55. It opens with Medusa's original head being taken away from Britt the Builder, who has been using it to turn bandits into statues around the city-state of Mycenae, including Mycenae's graveyard where the head is being buried by Medusa's sisters, Euryale and Stheno. Euryale has learnt writing from Britt and is writing her magnum opus, the history of the gods void of the religious spin that priests put on stories, but Stheno is dubious of writing and whether it is useful. Cadmus then arrives, much enthused by Euryale's passion for writing. However it is Britt he is here to meet, who is quick on his feet to escape what he thinks is a Narrative event. When Cadmus explains that his sister, Europa, was taken by Zeus to Crete, Britt remarks how strange that is and suggests that Cadmus do more reconnaissance to discover the truth. He also suggests recruiting Medusa for that task as she is a pegasus able to scout the island and finds himself joining Cadmus after all. Later Cadmus arrives at the Temple of Apollo on Mount Parnassus where everyone is waiting for him as Medusa couldn't carry everyone the whole distance. He reveals his weapons were all stolen on the way and Euryale believes he should be using his brain to fight. Tiresias states that they need to found their own city-state if they are to challenge Crete and that people would be attracted to the city if there was some founding myth to it. Sibyl plans that Medusa, as a pegasus, has mythiscism about her and that she should walk until exhausted. She disccusses the nature of fate, how fate is merely the most probable outcome of predictable factors but that changing fate, even the smallest of changes, would have drastic consequences on the future. Britt doesn't want to change time because of the hassle it would cause from fate deities or even Chronos, keeper of time. Medusa is reluctant but agrees when they assert they will go with her. However she is the only one walking as everyone else sails along the river in The Wind Waker. Red, the Spartoi, is hated by all of the newcomers to the group as she insults all of them, especially bulling Britt about his haircut. Eventually Medusa tires, though she claims it is a headache from all of the noise from the arguing with Red, and stops. Tiresias instantly leaps from the ship to investigate the area while Euryale documents their journey in her notebook. Post Pegasus Walk Britt: “But my statues were great! Do you know how difficult it is to convince a bandit to pose?” The hole where Medusa’s old Gorgon head was placed was then filled in. Only Britt was crying, though for all the wrong reasons. Britt: “Now how can I make such brilliant statues for my buildings?” Two of the Gorgon Sisters were present but Medusa herself didn’t want to watch the burial of her own head. The new Kingdom of Mycenae was coming along nicely, with new buildings being constructed and the fields were brimming with plants and animals. The former people of Ethiopia that migrated with their queen, Andromeda, to Greece were frequently mixing with the white Greek people that migrated to the new, grand city from other city-states such as Athens and the nearer Sparta. Stheno: “Well, at least that part of Medusa can now rest in peace.” Britt: “You know she didn’t mind me using it, right? Why are you taking my toys from me?” Stheno: “You should learn respect for the dead!” Britt: “I do! Doesn’t mean I need to respect their severed heads. Besides, she’s not even dead!” Stheno: “You’re intolerable.” Euryale turned her weary head to roll her eyes at them both. Euryale: “You’re like an old, married couple. You should just make out and get it over with, you’ll feel better.” Britt and Stheno turned their surprised heads to look at each other in consideration. They both shook themselves free of the idea after a second with an affirmative, and mutual, ‘no way’. Euryale: “Then can you both please stop bickering? At least if you were married, I could look forward to having nieces or nephews. Instead, you’re just annoying with no payoff.” Stheno: “What about you!? You spend all your time with Britt! You marry him!” Euryale: “He said no.” Stheno: “Whoa, wait, what? When did this happen?” Britt: “She just wants me for my insider-knowledge. You shouldn’t be so shallow.” Euryale: “It’d be easier to write my theses if you were around all the time.” Stheno: “You do know a marriage includes things like sharing, caring and sex?” Euryale: “I can do those things.” Britt: “And love, you forget that part?” The two women burst out laughing. Stheno: “How old are you? Like twelve? Jesus.” Britt: “Cold. Sure you’re still not monsters?” Euryale: “You know, I do still sometimes get the urge to eat people again…” She glared at Britt, who shuffled away. Stheno: “She’s lying. We never ate anyone. Though there might have been some nibbling here and there.” Britt: “Comforting.” Euryale: “So, do you have time? I want to continue writing about Apollo.” Stheno: “I really hate this new hobby of yours.” Euryale: “It is no hobby! This is a great undertaking! My magnum opus! People will study my guide to the gods for generations.” Britt chuckled. Britt: “Until they stop worshipping the old gods.” Euryale: “What?” Britt: “Uh, nothing.” Stheno: “Leave it to the priests, Euryale!” Euryale: “But they lie! They spin everything to fit their agenda! I want to tell the cold, hard truth. The facts. My book isn’t a religious text, it’s a history text!” Stheno: “You know nobody even knows what writing is? Nobody can understand those squiggles you’re using. Who is going to appreciate it?” Britt: “You could use hieroglyphicsHieroglyph article, Wikipedia.?” Euryale: “What? Here is a sun and here is a cow and this crappy drawing is a god. What are people supposed to really understand from that? Where’s the analysis? Where’s the speculative questions about the nature of the god and their place in our society? Where’s the deep, long, history of them? All you can figure out is there is a god, there is a sun and that’s one fat cow. Genius.” Britt: “That’s a bit negative, don’t you think? Egyptians manage.” Euryale: “You taught me writing!” Britt: “Yes I did. I know. It’s great, it is! But if you really want people to understand you, you have to know your audience. Most civilised people can understand pictures. So you should probably write for them.” Euryale: “I won’t compromise my art!” Stheno: “I thought it was history?” Euryale: “Writing history can be art!” Britt: “Well, who knows? Writing will come along at some point. Hopefully sooner rather than later.” Stheno: “Like it’s inevitable that people will start writing? Please. It’s a complete waste of time. Only nerds like Euryale will ever bother.” Euryale: “It’s we nerds who will shape the future, Stheno!” Cadmus: “Finally!” Stheno: “Jesus Christ!!” The three of them spun on the spot to see a man stood there. He was wearing an odd looking, green tunic and a silly hat. He was also adorned with hundreds of weapons. Cadmus: “Someone that can write! You know, I’ve been surrounded by so many who can’t write? I’ve had to teach everyone around me to read, just so they can understand the post-it notes I leave around my ship. ‘Do the dishes’, ‘put the toilet seat down’, ‘tidy your bed’ and all that. Half the time they claim they’ve forgotten how to read but I know they’re just coming up with an excuse not to do their chores.” Britt: “Riiiiiiiiight, well I smell narrative so I’m going to leave now.” As he turned Cadmus quickly stepped in front of him. Cadmus: “Aren’t you Britt?” Britt: “I should really steal that Helm of Invisibility from Perseus.” Cadmus: “I was sent to find you. Sibyl, the Oracle of Delphi, said you could help me. Would you come with me, back to Delphi?” Britt: “Not in a million years. Actually, scratch that, a million years might actually pass for me. So no, no ever.” Cadmus: “But… but…” Britt: “Look. The last time she sent someone to find me for some urgent quest, I showed up and she just wanted me to make her more strawberry ice cream. I’m not falling for it again. I told her, she’s eating too much of the stuff. Honestly, this is 1270BC. Who the hell is fat at this time?” Euryale: “What’s BC?” Britt: “Banana Crème. It’s an ancient dating system from Atlantis because dates were invented by the guy that invented Banana Crème Oreos. True fact.” Both Cadmus and Euryale were scribbling on notebooks. When they both looked up to see each other doing the same, they became embarrassed. Britt: “Oh look. Love at first words. Bye now!” He marched away. Cadmus chased him. Britt: “What? Dude! Go away! I’m not going with you!” Cadmus: “But you have to!” Britt: “This is harassment!” Cadmus: “Please! My sister is in danger!” Britt slowed. Partly because he couldn’t ignore such a line, but also because he was already out of breath after just a few metres. He grabbed his side and whined from the stitch. Cadmus: “Really? I have dozens of weapons on me and I’m not tied.” Britt: “Don’t judge me!” The two women were strolling over, gossiping, while Cadmus drew a breath and began his tale. Cadmus: “My sister was taken by Zeus and has her captive on the isle of Crete. In order to get there I will need resources to attack the entire Cretan nation. Sibyl explained I would need the help of one who does not fear or even respect the gods. And that’s you.” Britt: “Zeus took your sister?” Cadmus: “Yes. Her name is Europa. My name is Cadmus, by the way. My ship is The Wind Waker.” Britt: “Strange.” Cadmus: “Yes, I didn’t name is.” Britt: “I didn’t mean that. If you really want my advice, Cadmus, it is this. Do more research.” Cadmus: “You mean like reconnaissance?” Britt: “Let’s begin there, sure.” Cadmus: “So you will help me?” Britt: “Huh? No! I didn’t agree to that!” Cadmus: “You said ‘let’s’!” Britt: “But… that was just… oh bloody hell. Why can’t I just be left alone? It’s like the Multiverse is out to annoy me.” Cadmus: “Multiverse?” Britt: “Like, many universes.” Cadmus: “Universe?” Britt: “Nevermind. If you really want to look at Crete, you could recruit Medusa.” Stheno: “You want to get our sister into trouble?” The two women had reached the two men. They weren’t far from the main city of Mycenae as the graveyard was nearby so people could visit their ancestors. Two bandit statues stood to mark the entrance to the gravesite. Britt had somehow convinced them to look sad before he turned the poor sods to stone, making very apt and realistic statues. They were painted, as was typical for all Greek statues, in bright colours. Britt hadn’t been very impressed with the brightness of the colours, but the choice had been made without him. So despite looking sombre and upset in mood, in tone they looked like flamboyant rainbows. Britt: “You talk like your sister is some delicate little petal. I watched her bash some dude’s head in with her hooves a few months ago. She’s been running on adventures ever since we defeated Poseidon’s Cetus ten years ago. I think she can handle a little reconnaissance.” Cadmus: “Did you say hooves?” Euryale: “She’s a Pegasus.” Stheno: “A flying horse.” Cadmus looked at the two women. Cadmus: “Sister?” Cadmus reached the Temple of Apollo on Mount Parnassus to find Sibyl, Tiresias, Euryale, Stheno and Britt lounging around on futons as they gossiped and drank wine. Medusa was lapping wine from a bowl on the table. Tiresias: “So she said, “call a cab, I’m going home!’” They all started laughing at this outrageously funny joke that Cadmus was unable to appreciate as he panted before them. Finally they noticed his arrival. Sibyl: “Cadmus! About time!” Cadmus: “Well, you did leave me to make the long trip back here…” Medusa: “Yeah, sorry about that. I couldn’t carry all of you.” Britt: “Hope you had a safe trip!? Only took you, what, a month?” Cadmus: “I got kidnapped by pirates, sold as a slave in Sparta, made to peel olives for some rich merchant and had to escape in a wine barrel floating down the river.” There was a long pause. Britt: “Nothing too bad then!” Cadmus looked like he might cry. Stheno: “Why not have some wine? Take a load off!” Britt: “Speaking of load, where are those weapons? Couldn’t you fight off the pirates? Didn’t I see you with a bloody uzi?” Cadmus: “I couldn’t figure out how to work it. I tried to use a spear, a sword and I even tried to shoot arrows at them…” His head fell. Cadmus: “I’m not much of a fighter…” He wiped his eye. Cadmus: “They took all my weapons from me. Even my blowgun!” Euryale: “You shouldn’t have all those weapons anyway, Cadmus. You have a great mind! You should use that as your weapon instead!” Stheno: “She’s chatting him up already.” Euryale: “I’m being nice!” She flicked her blonde hair in irritation. Euryale: “Can’t I be nice?” Stheno: “I’m sure you’ll be very nice to Cadmus…” Medusa: “Hey, I’m all for it, Euryale. You go get your man.” Cadmus wearily sat down on the end of a futon and, with shaking hands, managed to get a cup of wine and gulped it down. All of it. Britt: “Wow.” Sibyl: “You’re going to get drunk. And I don’t need to see the future to know that.” Tiresias: “Well now that he’s back, I suppose we should get down to business. I know you want to go and check out Crete, but I think first we need to start up the plans for our conquest. Talking to Britt and Medusa, I think we can use the model of Perseus and Andromeda to start our empire!” Britt: “You want Cadmus to get married?” Tiresias: “I meant we should start a city. That’s how Greece operates. City-states. Athens, Sparta, Lesbos—” Stheno snorts. Tiresias: “They’re powerful city-states. That’s where power comes from in these parts. If you want to challenge Crete, you need a city full of money and people.” Stheno: “How will you get people to come? You can’t just kidnap them and force them to live in your crappy hamlet.” Tiresias: “Every great city needs a founding story. If people think your city is some divine, blessed land that is favoured by the gods then they will come to seek their fortune.” Britt: “This girl’s pretty smart!” Tiresias: “I’m not a girl!” Britt: “Sorry. Woman. You just look quite young.” Tiresias: “I’m a man!” Britt looked from Tiresias down to his cup of wine and back again. Britt: “I’m drunk, but not that drunk.” Tiresias: “I was turned into a woman by Hera. I’m a man trapped inside a woman’s body.” Britt laughed. Britt: “Rather you than me!” Sibyl smirked evilly at Britt. Sibyl: “Careful not to dismiss others’ misfortune because you never know…” Britt: “Of all the things that could happen to me, I don’t think becoming a woman is high on that list.” Euryale: “You’d make a terrible woman.” Stheno: “You’d be a hideously ugly woman.” Britt: “You know, not everyone can be born as beautiful as you!” Stheno cocked her head and brushed her blonde hair from her cheeks. Stheno: “You think I’m beautiful?” Britt rolled his eyes. Britt: “I thought the talking horse was supposed to be the vain one?” Medusa: “I’m a pegasus! I’m more awesome than a horse!” Britt: “Yep. Vain.” Stheno: “Everyone likes to be called beautiful by someone they like, Britt.” Euryale: “Ho ho, you like Britt do you?” Stheno: “That’s not what I meant! Shut up you!” Medusa: “You’re all acting like children! Euryale just snog Cadmus and get married. Stheno just… actually no don’t. I hate Britt.” Britt: “You’re just upset because no man will have you now that you’re a horse.” Medusa: “I am upset, yes! And I have to fight off the stallions!” There was a lot of chuckling at Medusa’s expense. Cadmus: “But what about this city-state I’m supposed to create? This divine founding story? Are we supposed to just lie? I don’t think I want to do that.” Sibyl: “No need to lie. I will tell you how you will found the city and it will be genuinely mystical and get people interested.” Cadmus: “Okay, that sounds interesting. How?” Sibyl jerked her thumb at Medusa. Sibyl: “Medusa will decide where to found it.” Medusa: “I will?” Cadmus: “That’s it?” Sibyl: “She’s a talking horse.” Cadmus: “… and that’s enough?” Sibyl: “She starts walking and when she stops, there you found your city.” Medusa took a few steps and then stopped. Medusa: “Done. That was easy. Call the press!” Sibyl: “Stop as in stop when you can’t keep going anymore.” Cadmus: “That seems a bit cruel.” Medusa: “Yeah! What’re you trying to do to me!? Don’t you know I keep these hooves in pristine shape?” Sibyl: “That’s the origin story for your city-state! Take it or leave it.” Britt: “Can he leave it?” Sibyl: “Fate isn’t actually fate, you know? Not in the sense people say fate. It’s more like there are a series of probabilities and possibilities and from them we find a path. Usually it’s firm because we all behave in predictable ways. A selfish person can be counted on to act selfishly, for example, ergo the path is clear. But when that person is told of their path, then they may choose not to take that path and we end up with one of the less clear paths that were possible. But be aware, if you choose something different based on your knowledge of the future, then you’ll actually change the entire course of fate for everything on this planet and possible the galaxy and maybe even beyond.” Britt: “One guy decides to make his city somewhere else and the entire universe is changed?” Sibyl: “You know time doesn’t just stop when we die, right? You should know that best of all. What one person does now, here, changes the future. If, for example, Euryale has a child—” Euryale: “Wow, why me?” Sibyl: “Just an example. If you have a child, that child has children and those children have children and those children have children. It ripples on and on and on. One day humanity goes to the stars, but how do they get there and who goes there? Perhaps some of them are the long distant descendants of Euryale here. They don’t know their ancestry this far back, but it happened. Now, what if she chooses to have no children based on this knowledge? Entire generations of people would be wiped from existence. The future completely changed. And before you suppose that her descendants may never amount to much, consider that every small task done adds to the greater weave of fate. One descendant is a murderer, for example.” Euryale: “Jesus, come on…” Sibyl: “He kills someone else. If that someone else lived, they or their children or their children’s children may have written a popular book that inspired others to do something great. One act by one person changes the events of everyone else’s lives. Consider teachers. An individual teacher shapes hundreds of children in both personality and ambition. One of Euryale’s descendants is a teacher that inspires someone else to do something. Even the blacksmith. He makes a batch of arrows. Those arrows are used by a hunter to get food for a town. The town survives because that blacksmith made arrows. If he didn’t make those arrows, the hunter doesn’t get the food and people die and change the future. Think of it all like dominoes. Fate will have to make major course corrections even for the smallest thing. Usually it’s kind of like a flowing river, making small adjustments thanks to fate following, like water, the path of least resistance – the paths with the highest probabilities. But when you deliberately force a low probability outcome, fate has to make some major course corrections and the knock-on effect is huge – right down the river.” Britt: “Great. Well that was a long, pointless spiel because we’re just going to do what you said to do in the first place.” Medusa: “We are? Not sure I want to!” Britt: “Look, you walk around a bit. When you get tired and can’t keep walking you sit down and we build a tent around your fat, white arse. It’ll be uncomfortable for a bit, just get over it. I don’t have any other ideas and I don’t fancy Chronos coming down here and complaining at me because we changed time.” Euryale: “Chronos?” Britt: “Keeper of time on Earth. Hell we might even get some gods of fate down here to bitch at us too. So, let’s just keep things easy for all of us and do some walking. Okay?” Medusa: “It’s me whose got to do the bloody walking!” Stheno: “We’ll be right there with you!” Later, Medusa was slowly trotting along the riverside. Her hooves were getting sore and her legs were aching. Her head was drowsy and her strength was depleting. They’d been walking almost all day. Cadmus: “Don’t stop yet, there’s got to be somewhere better than this just further down! We need to make sure there’s plenty of arable land and trees for wood! At least that’s what Tiresias said before he went to sleep…” Stheno: “Keep it up, sis! You can do it!” Red: “Oi! You dozy, blonde cunt! Get away from the edge of the ship or you’ll fall in! I won’t stop for you, you’ll be left to drown!” Stheno: “You are the most uncouth little monster I’ve ever met.” Red: “I’ll take that as a compliment. Now move that fat ass.” Stheno: “Fat!!!? My—bottom is not fat!” Britt: “It’s a bit big.” Stheno: “What!?” Britt: “That’s not a bad thing, you know? Lots of guys like that!” Stheno: “I hate you.” Red: “Who doesn’t!? Look at that stupid haircut. Like a fucking bowl on his head.” Britt: “This is classic Roman style!” Sibyl: “You know there is no Rome yet? Not really?” Britt: “There’s a very nice village there, I’ll have you know.” Sibyl: “You think they have bowl cuts?” Britt: “No. Not yet.” Sibyl: “Well then.” Britt: “I’m just ahead of my time, okay? I am the trendsetter! Bowl cuts for the win!” Red: “I’m going to bite your balls off if you carry on.” Britt: “I am not ashamed to admit that this brat scares the crap out of me.” Stheno: “I think she scares everyone.” Euryale: “Except Tiresias.” Yellow: “Big Sister Tie like to sleep a lot whenever she’s on the ship.” Cadmus: “He’s very smart. Instead of enduring all the fighting, he just sleeps through it all until we hit land.” Blue 1: “You trying to say you don’t enjoy our company?” Blue 2: “Mr Cadmus hates us…” Cadmus: “No, no. That’s not what I’m saying. … not exactly.” Green: “I’m getting tired just watching the poor horsie…” Medusa: “When you said you’d be with me, I thought you’d be out here with me. Not riding along in a fricking boat!” Violet: “It’s a ship! Not a boat!” Medusa: “I just got called a horsie so I’ll call that whatever I bloody well please.” Red: “We should stick a firecracker up the horse’s ass to get her moving faster.” Green: “That might hurt her butt though.” Yellow: “Haha, butt.” Green: “Hahaha, butt.” Red: “You pair of stupid, Minion[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minions_(Despicable_Me) Minions (Despicable Me)] article, Wikipedia. -fucking morons. I’m going to shove your heads up her ass!” Britt: “It’s like poetry. Incredibly obscene and abrasive poetry.” Red: “You got something you want to say to me, bowl-fucker?” Britt: “So because I have a bowl cut, that means I want to have sex with bowls?” Red: “Yes, bowl-fucker, it does.” Stheno: “Just ignore her.” Red: “Yeah, listen to the fat ass. Ignore me, bowl-fucker.” Stheno: “You little--!” Medusa: “Okay, okay… that’s it… I can’t go on…” Cadmus: “She’s finally too tired to go on!” Medusa: “Actually, it’s the headache you lot are giving me…” She finally slumped down to her knees. Tiresias: “This is a fine spot!” Cadmus: “Whoa!” Tiresias had suddenly woken up and leapt to her feet. She was admiring the landscape. Britt: “Conveniently awake now, huh?” Tiresias hopped over the edge of The Wind Waker and landed in the river. She swam out towards Medusa. Cadmus: “I’m surprised he cares so much about Medusa…” Tiresias reached the shore and walked straight past the fallen Pegasus. Cadmus: “Or not.” Britt: “Lower the gangplank so we can get to Medusa.” The spartoi were instantly in action. The ship got closer to the shore and the gangplank was dropped for everyone to disembark. Tiresias, still soaking wet, was stalking along the woodland edge and looking at hills and poking rocks. Euryale: “Well, at least she’s thorough. I’m sure we’ll get a nice place built in no time. We have a master builder, that’s you Britt—” Britt: “I know. I’m Britt the Builder for a reason. I just hope the building stays up this time…” Euryale: “The genius strategist in Tiresias. The writing skills of myself, the future-sight of Sibyl, the determination of Cadmus and the…” She looked at her sister. Euryale: “And Stheno is here.” Stheno turned on her sister with dark eyes. Stheno: “Are you trying to imply I’m useless?” Britt: “Moral support?” Euryale: “She wants to give you moral support…” Stheno: “Don’t start that again!” Cadmus: “You two are almost as bad as the children. Can we try not bickering? Please? Let’s be friends, eh?” Britt: “It’s okay. When you and Euryale write all this down, you can leave out all the whinging and arguing.” Red: “Hurry up, you stupid motherfuckers!” Britt: “And the swearing. Leave that out too.” Notes Britt's Commentary "This is loosely based on the founding mythFounder of Thebes section, Cadmus article, Wikipedia. of the city of ThebesThebes, Greece article, Wikipedia. in GreeceGreece article, Wikipedia., where CadmusCadmus article, Wikipedia. followed a cow to found the city on the prophecy of the Oracle of DelphiOracle of Delphi article, Wikipedia.. I wanted to give a good explanation of 'fate' by clearly stating that it is not some mystical or resolute force, which gives more freedom to Writers. I decided to bring back both Euryale and Stheno for this Cadmus mini-series rather than leaving them as minor side characters in the Perseus mini-series, thus I gave them clearly defined characteristics and drives, especially with Euryale. The decision to reuse Medusa came very early, long before I even wanted to write about Cadmus, as I think she's a character deserving of a greater role. I deliberately left out Perseus at this point so that he doesn't overshadow Cadmus in his own mini-series." ~ Britt the Writer References External References Category:Post Category:Leg Post